Shine

I was in my room when I heard my dad and his friends in one of his meetings they talked about authentic self expression I didn't know what it meant so I checked and it's a true self and I think I'm not real every thing that I am is things that worked around my environment I don't think I am a real person I have a lot of thoughts but I don't know if they are my thoughts my dad wanted me to join their meeting but I lied and said I need to help mom I hate does meetings it started when I was 9 I started getting into the meetings and they thought I was cute and they told me and I liked it but then they started doing dirty things to me and I didn't like it and my mom walked in to the room and she screamed and then my dad and mom yelled at each ather and now mom act like she is ok with does dirty thing but I know that is a not true thing because I see her cry at night a lot and it makes me feel a little less sad to know that she cares about me but then I feel more sad because mabey she doesn't care as much as I think because she doesn't stop them,sometime I wish I was alone in the world with no one to hurt just my friends and I could play all day and mabey I could feel very happy always intend of sad.
Shine