I'm his pacifier

Today is the day, it's the big day, it may change our whole life, but I guess it's worth it, Harry waited for so long, he really deserves it, I know that if it was up to me I would never make it, but knowing he waited so many years for us, he's a really proper lad.

So what's today you ask? Today Harry is finally coming out.

I remember the day harry told us that he was gay, four years ago, 2012. He was so scared of our reaction, but he shouldn't, we were really supportive of him, that what I like to think. We didn't take distance or made him feel different, cuz he wasn't. Yet, you probably wonder why Harry and I became so strangers to each other. Well most of you know the answer, fucking Modest!

I can recall every sentence from that meeting, me and Harry never hated each other, we just had to act like we're not close, because of all the rumors, we're dating. I admit, my relationship with Harry was a bit different from the others, but that's since Harry was the youngest, I always felt the need to protect him, he was only 16 when this journey began, and I needed to know he was safe. Our bond got stronger and stronger through the years, and I was glad about it, never in my wildest dreams I thought me and Harry will date, and not because he wasn't my tape or something like that. It just that I'm not gay, so as a straight I never thought about dating a guy. But I think whoever dates Harry is a lucky guy.

So why me and Harry aren't that close as we were before, I guess it's really hard to keep a relationship in a secret, we are talking the same way as old times, and I still feel the need to keep him safe, but not as much as before.

This date has been set for two years ago, when Harry came out to us, he told us he knew he is gay for couple of months, but he's still not willing to share it with the world. We told him to take his time, it's all up to him, and we will always have his back.
After two months he came out to Simon and the production, our staff and modest. You can figure by yourself why modest didn't like it, and that's part of the reason why they separated Harry and I. They say they can't afforded themselves Harry being gay, harry was the suppose 'womanizer', he was the lady's man. They were being stupid, I know the fans will keep loving us, straight or gay.

"Hey, you're ready?" I asked him as we sat in the dressing room, Harry was coming out in a video going to be played at the end of the night at BBC1, he's recording the video now, explaining to the world everything, well, everything he can.

"I'm nervous Lou, what's wrong with me, I've been waiting for ages" he said getting up from his feet and walking in circles. "Haz calm down, it's your big day, don't need to look all sweaty, besides you have nothing to worry about we record it now, it's not live or anything, you can take your time, yeah?" I said, watching his worried face nodding.
A sudden buzz came out from his phone, he took it out of the pocket, "it's Will" he informed, "oh answer that's fine" I said, fake smiling to him.

I haven't mentioned, Harry has a boyfriend, Will best they've been dating for year and half now, and that's great and all, but the thing about will is that I don't like him. He's like perfect, you know he's tan, he has brown dark eyes, and abs and biceps, and he looks great with Harry, he's also taller than Harry, so he's like the protecting boyfriend, and he always does what Harry wants, and he hugs Harry, and make him the little spoon he is. He's also known to this world and know it all, so it's not like he's having all the breaks down when Harry's not around, he takes a good care of harry. he's the one to settle with and have a family and a dog with, he's funny and you can see how much he loves Harry, so I ask myself again why I got a problem with him? And that's the answer, he's too perfect to be true, I never find one flaw about him, and I'm worried that one day it will come out, and Harry will be crushed cuz that's not the same person he loved, but that's me over analyzing. Harry got out of the room long time ago to take the call.

"Louis would you tell Harry he's going to film in 5" Ben said and left, I felt bad having Harry to hung up the phone but I had no choice, ugh I hate getting up. I opened the door, watching Harry standing in front of the window, I can see him smiling, he's cheek was really showing.

"Will you do that?"
…
"I guess, but that's only cuz I love your pretty face"
…
"Am not"
…
"Fine maybe a little, I just want to make others smile"
…
"Stop it, I'm not a cupcake, I'm too long"
…
"Prefer, sex on legs"
…
"I've learned from the best"

I realized I should stop eavesdropping, "Harry?" I called, Harry turned around, "they're waiting for you" I said, standing awkwardly in the doorway, "ok, I'm coming" Harry said, I figured that's my cue to leave, but I wanted to hear the rest of the call, so I walked rather slow

"It's time"
…
"Yeah I'll talk to you later"

Harry hung up the phone, and walked over me, "wish me luck" he said.

Three hours later, I was with Zayn, having a smoke, habit I should really drop and not just saying it. "You think they'll finish soon? I told El I'll be home soon so we can watch a movie together" I asked, "dunno man, I don't get why it takes so long either, I'm knocked" he said finishing his fag.
"Guys, they want you in" one of the new bodyguards said, i dropped my fag to the floor stepping on it, me and Zayn walked in were all the guys were, "you're ok?" I asked Harry, "yeah, lots better"
"Ok guys it's a big day today, today at nine p.m. On BBC1 you can all watch the tape we recorded, it's staring with you all, moving toward Harry's story. Now, you guys, do not tweet about it, it's better if you won't even go on Twitter, and do not come out to public places until it's calm down"
"Be sure, Zayn will follow the rules" I said, when they laughed.
"Off you go" the manager said
"Finally home" I said to Niall standing next to me
"Yeah mate" when we all took our things, I've noticed Harry was gone, "hey Nialler where's Harry?"
"I think he went to the lobby, Will came or something" he said, I don't know why I felt little pressure in my chest, but I figured it was because of this guy. When I was ready I said goodbye to everyone, I went down the elevator, getting to the lobby.
"You came" I heard Harry yelling, from joy of course, I didn't see him at first but when I moved towards the exit I saw clearly, Harry jumping on the known Will, "I told you I would" he said, holding Harry with both of his hands. They were a lovely couple I'm not going to deny it, the fans would love them for sure, well the true fans who will stay.

Harry put his hands on Will's cheeks and kissed him, I didn't know if I'm allowed to look, but something told me to keep looking, as if I was too curious about their relationship, I can see how much Harry loves will, and how he always smiles when he talks about him, and I know that will loves Harry, cuz who wouldn't, but for some reason I don't get why even after year and a half they're still in the honey moon stage, like me and Eleanor have been there for six months, I still love her, but I don't feel all butterflies and big smiles and all that when I see her. maybe it's because we're together for five years. You must think, why the hell I haven't proposed yet. I'm at the normal age, and five years don't just go down to hell, but for some reason I can't bring myself doing that, and Eleanor being her charming self never pressured me doing it.

"Oh hi Lou" Harry said, pulling me out from my thoughts, "yeah hi" he was still in Will's hold, but when Will noticed me he put Harry down, and stand behind Harry, hands on his waist, "hi louis? How are you?" Will asked being too polite to my liking.
"I'm fine, you?" I asked, "haz everyone already took their stuffs maybe you should take yours" I said not giving any time for perfect Will to answer, "yeah sure, thanks a lot for today louis, you did calmed me a bit" he said showing his perfect smile, with his lovely dimple, and if Will wasn't there I would probably poke it.
"No problem, you're my friend, that's what friends do"
"I should take my bag now" he said, getting out of Will hold and coming to hug me, I soon hugged back, that was a quick hug, like bros, something that's not feels like Harry. "Come babe" he said to Will and went off, "bye louis it was nice seeing you again" Will said, being dragged by giggly Harry.

"El, I'm home" I shouted when I got in the house, I took off my shoes, "I'm in the living room" she yelled back, I walked over, entering the room, and falling over the sofa, I put my legs in her lap, "long day?" She asked "not really, just tired" I said.
"Catch some sleep, I'll wake you up for the movie yeah"
I took the pillow from the sit and let my mind wander, I thought about the day, and I couldn't help but think why am I not excited getting more time with El, why didn't I feel the need to touch her, kiss her?

And why the hell I'm compromising our relationship with Harry&Will?